My parents own a farm in Montana. Last year we took a vacation there with extended family to do some work around the 100 year old farmhouse. We partially split time between doing some improvements around the house and simply enjoying one another. We had a great time spending time with family and enjoying a change from our typical lives. Now we’re trying to decide if we can make the trip happen again this year, but we have some conflicts with other life activities for the dates that everyone is meeting up. In evaluating things, I’ve been trying to put the decision of going in the context of 30 years from now.

I find myself asking questions like will I regret us missing Hijo’s preschool graduation in 30 years? Would I feel bad in 30 years if Hijo misses a week of kindergarten for a memorable family trip? What will have a long term impact on us as a family?

I’m finding putting some of these decisions in the context of 30 years is helpful. I get caught up in things like knowing school is important but believing the only way to succeed at school is to achieve perfect attendance. I often get so wound up about small societal rules, I forget to live my life. But 30 years from now, I will look back on things with a bit more clarity. I will undoubtedly have some regrets, but I’d prefer to have more moments with wonderful memories, strong family culture, and a smile on my face, than a bunch of rules checked off my mental list.

So many decisions lack black or white clarity. I have a hard time making decisions, especially when it comes to bigger life events. However, expanding my perspective and looking beyond the tunnel vision of today helps me. I plan on practicing this more and more in my life.

What about you? What you so caught up with that you lack clarity and a long term perspective?